ωнɑт кιи∂ oғ ωoяʟ∂ ωoυʟd ωә вә ʟιviiиɢ ιи ιғ тнәʀә ωɑs иo мυsιc?

I walked in on him kissing Taylor.
What is going on?
Just a couple days after he told me he liked me.
I left immediatly.
I felt dizzy.
Angry.
Sad.
Mad at myself.
Wait.
Why was Taylor here anyways?
My stomach twisted in a knot.
I guess this is what happens when you keep secrets from the people you care the most. I had told everyone I had forgotten something on the bus, because I knew Justin was in there. I thought he was just taking a moment before we went out on stage, just to get his thoughts together. And I had made an excuse to go and make sure he was okay. Ever since he told me, I wanted to tell him how I really did like him too. I just didn't think becoming a couple right now was the smartest idea. So I had to tell him I didn't like him.
I walked off and went back with Chaz and Ryan. They were watching youtube videos on their phones. We were back stage, waiting to do a rehearsal and sound check and such. I sat in my make-up chair and had to pretend everything was fine. I heard steps coming into the room. I turned around and faked a huge smile at Justin and Taylor. ''SEL!!!!'' Taylor screemed. She ran over and gave me a big hug. I couldn't help but feeling happy to see her anyways. But I avoided eye contact with Justin, even though I could tell he was looking at me. Taylor took my hand and we walked around the stadium. In a few hours, it would be filled with all our fans. That thought helped me push forward through these weird feelings. We caught up with everything. I did miss hanging out with her. But I couldn't help replaying what I saw.
''So how is your tour going?'' She asked. She had her hair in a high bun and was wearing casual clothes.
''Well, it's fun...except there's more boys. So I'm really glad you're here,'' I smiled. I really was glad. Just before we could talk more, I was called on stage for sound check. I went up and I sang a song. They tested lights, the speakers, smoke, and what not. Taylor had walked back to the dressing room so I headed back there. Before I came in, I heard their voice echoing in the hallway.
''So, why did you run after we kissed?'' Taylor's voice asked.
''I, you kissed me... I was talking about someone else,'' Justin said slowly and hesitantly.
''Oh,'' Taylor let out. ''Oh my gosh! I feel so stupid!''
''No, it's not your fault! I should have just told you who it was at first. I think... I think I was just scared you'd tell her.''
Now everything made sense. I decided to walk in at that moment, maybe it help Taylor out of the awkward moment, but also I couldn't get caught listening.
''Hey,'' I said.
''Hi, '' Justin said, with hopeful eyes. I didn't really know how to react so I just went to my chair.
''I'll do your make-up,'' Taylor said.
''I'll let you girls alone,'' Justin kind of laughed and then left. After a minute of silence to make sure he was gone, Taylor ran to the door and slammed it shut which made me jumped.
''What??'' I asked her. She was leaning against the door, with half a smile on her face. Then she started to laugh. I kind of laughed at her.
''You'll never guess!'' She says.
''I know I won't, tell me,'' I tell her. She comes back to me and begins to put make-up on my face.
''So, the other day Justin invited me here, to keep you company. But then when I got here he asked me buncha questions to help him out with this girl. So I thought it was me, and that he invited me here 'cause he liked me,'' She paused then rolled her eyes. ''I was so off!''
''I know,'' I simply say. She made me close my eyes for eyeliner.
''What do you mean?'' She asked.
''Well, a couple days before you came... he kinda told me he like me...'' I tell her.
I couldn't feel a brush on my face anymore. I opened my eyes.
'' Why didn't you tell me!?'' She asked. '' I could have avoided a lot of embarassement!!!'' She yelled, smiling though.
''I don't know... I told him I didn't like him because I thought it would be an idea to tell him the truth I guess.... And you never answered my texts or calls, we're both pretty bus-''
''HOLD UP!'' She took a step back. I laughed.
''What?'' I said still laughing. She was acting overly dramatic to make me laugh. Then her face got all serious.
''The truth?''
''What?''
''You said that you didn't want to tell him the truth,'' She said. I stopped laughing. Had I really let out my secret? She began to poke me. ''You like him don't you!?''
I got up and went to the rack where all my outfits where hanging. I took one and smiled at her.
''I'm gonna go change!''
''Pshh, whatever! I know the truth!'' She smiled back. Just then, I passed him and his friends and they go in the dressing room. It was more like a big hangout room, with all the make-up and hair stuff I needed, but I went in a bathroom to change anyways. Then I took a moment to focus. I couldn't let all this mess with me right now. We were going to perform soon. Focus.
***
A thousand people singing along to my songs. To his songs. A thousand people cheering, screaming, dancing. We bowed down after the last song, and we walked off stage. I could still hear the crowd back in the dressing room. Taylor came and hugged me, then handed me a water bottle. I went to my chair and took off the make-up, brushed out my hair and put it in a high pony tail. Then I went to change into sweat pants. My mom was out to dinner with the other adults. We were escorted by the security to our bus. Tired of waiting for the grown-ups, all five of us went for ice cream. It was a little shop with bright lights and hundreds of flavors. The employee was sweeping the floor while we all laughed at Chaz acting goofy, like always. We always had so much fun. And, thankfully, it wasn't really awkward. Afterwards, we went back in the bus and I helped Taylor set up a sleeping bag on the couch. There was so many people in here! I went to the back of the bus to brush my teeth after I said goodnight to Tay. Then I stood in the dark kitchen, only light by the weak moonlight.
''Hey,'' I heard. I turned around. I could barely see, but I knew it was Justin.
''Hi,'' I whispered. The entire bus was asleep. Except the driver, who was going to drive for a couple more hours before his break.
''Are you not tired?'' He asked. I leaned back against the counter. I crossed my arms, then let them fall to my side.
''No, I am. What about you?'' I looked back outside.
''Eh, a lot of things on my mind that are keeping me awake. I'm probably dead tired though,'' he laughed slightly. He leaned against the counter facing me, with a few feet apart, we stood there silently for a while.
''Sel, I know you saw, well... like, I didn't...she,'' He tried to explain himself.
''I know,'' I told him.
''You do?''
''Yeah, Taylor and I kinda put the pieces together,'' I looked for his eyes in the darkness. I could see them glimmer in the moonlight.
''Oh...good, 'cause, I don't like her like that...'' He said. I nodded. ''Well...I just wanted to clear that up, goodnight,'' he said, then he was gone. I wish he stayed, and kept talking.
I shook my head.
Then I went to sleep.
***
Taylor left earlier today. It was me with the boys again.
We were driving for a long time, mostly the entire day, but we'd get to stay at a hotel tonight because we were going to be interviewed tomorrow morning, and the hotel offered not only the space for the interview but hotel rooms for our group. I wished Taylor would have stayed for this!
We played many different board games, but we got bored of every single one of them. Scooter came and made Chaz and Ryan move so he could sit at the table.
''So, you guys, we won't really have time to talk before the interviews tomorrow. They are mainly going to ask you about this tour, at least that's what they said.'' He looks down at his clip board. ''Selena, you are starting at 7:30, and Justin you're starting at 8:00, but I still want you ready when she starts,'' He pointed at me with his pencil. ''Each of you will have 30 minutes alone, and they said they might try to get you guys together live at 9 o'clock, but they still haven't called me back... Pretty much, just stay calm, and be yourselves, you guys have done interviews before, you can handle it. If you don't know the answer to a question concerning the tour, well, I don't know what you can say,'' He smiled at us.
'Reassuring,' I thought. He got up then, and Chaz and Ryan came back. We started to look for a place where we could eat dinner. Time passed by, Taylor was texting me, trying to get stuff out of me. But I kept my mouth shut, and promised myself to not say anything anymore. I just had to get over it.
When we arrived at the hotel, my mom and I went up to our room and ordered room service. It was nice just hanging out with her. We went over the rest of the tour, which was a lot. I couldn't believe that many people wanted to see us perform. It's a pretty good feeling.
We heard a knock at the door. I went and opened it. Ryan was at the door.
''Hey, we are gonna go check out the pool, you wanna come?'' I looked at my mom and she nodded.
''Okay, I'm gonna change, wait for me!'' I went to change really fast, grabbed a towel, and joined the guys. We found the pool. Even though it was late, and closed, they let us go in. We had the entire pool area to ourselves. We swam around, and played Marco Polo. Then, the guys went in the jacuzzi, but I only put my feet in because it was really hot. I simply wrapped my towel around my shoulders and listened to their conversation. Well, half-listened.
These dudes could talk on and on. They never ran out of things to say. I wondered if they said even more stuff without me there. Just when I thought that, Chaz jumped out followed by Ryan and they left. It took me a moment to realized, because I had somewhat zoned out.
''What happened?'' I asked Justin. He shrugged.
''Wanna go?''
''Yeah, let's go,'' I said. He smiled and got out. We walked through the hallway in silence. There was so much I wanted to tell him. I don't think I could hold it in anymore. I was getting angry with myself.
''Justin?'' I said, stopping. He stopped too, and turned to face me.
''Yeah?'' He smiled. His face grew serious when I didn't respond right away.
''I lied to you,'' I let out. The words hung in the air, making the silence heavy.
''What? When?'' He asked.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. With my eyes still closed, ''When I told you I only like you as a friend.'' I slowly opened my eyes. He seemed confused, and suprised.
''Oh,'' He let out.
''And, I mean, I didn't want to lie to you, I just didn't think it would be the best idea to, like, be...umm...more than friends...on the tour...'' I was shaking. He grabbed me by my shoulders so I would look at him. His hands went down my arms to find my hands. He squeezed them gently.
''It's okay,'' he pulled me in closer. ''I understand,''
We were in the middle of the hallway. The lights were dim, and it was probably really late. We should both get sleep for tomorrow. Our faces were close...
''What do we do?'' He asked, bringing me back to earth.
The next thing that happened was beyond my control.
I kissed him. And he kissed me back.
We kissed in the middle of some hotel, I'm not really sure where. He wrapped his arms around me. And even though it was cold, with my hair still dripping from the pool on my back, I didn't want anything to stop this moment.
Of course, some old man had to come out of his room right next to us. Justin took my hand and we started walking away, slightly laughing at the man's face. Justin walked me to my room.
''Okay, so I'm going to ask you this again...and even if I loved you're previous answer... what do we do?'' he said. I smiled, and blushed probably.
''Well, keep it a secret from the media and stuff? For a little bit?'' I asked.
''Yeah, keeping it a secret would be the best. Let's just not tell anyone just yet.'' We were both hesitant, unsure of what would be the right thing to do.
We'll see...

hahaah he's just so cute

''It wont be long till the summer is gone, get your party on!''

Gone to the beach twice and it's only been like three days hahahah:D Just enjoying every moment <3!!!

I CANT WAIT ANYMORE!!! JUST ONE MORE DAY OF SCHOOL UNTIL FREEDOM!!!!!!!

So after this weekend, which will be dedicated to studying, I only have 3 DAYS LEFT!!!! I can't wait anymore. My brain is completely disconnected from school, I honestly don't care about it anymore!!! Especially looking at all the things ahead. Every adventure, hang out, thingie-majig I will do this summer will be so exciting!!!
Beach, beach,beach, beach....
Hanging out with friends. Then of course, those random days when you do absolutely nothing. Pj's all day and just relaxxxxxx..... I need those!!!
It's scary to think it's one of my last summers, ever.
That's really scary actually ;P
But I'm not gonna think about that, I'll just enjoy every minute of it. Even when I'm doing AP homework hahahaha ;P That will be fun too *sarcasm* :)